Chasing Approval: Are We Losing Ourselves to Society's Expectations?
This blog stems from a deep conversation with my little sister, where we explored the challenges of losing our humanity in the relentless pursuit of societal approval. What started as a casual discussion led us to reflect on how society—a framework of shared ideas—can sometimes trap us in expectations that pull us away from our true selves.
Society as a Construct
At its foundation, society is built on diverse beliefs, norms, and values that influence our behaviors and decisions. These constructs often dictate what is considered "acceptable" or "successful." As we strive to align with these expectations, we may unknowingly drift away from who we truly are, adopting personas designed to meet external standards rather than honoring our own inner truths.
The Journey of Self-Discovery
Societal norms often reflect a desire for connection, love, and authenticity. But when we begin a journey of self-discovery, we challenge these norms, realizing that genuine fulfillment comes from embracing our own values, not conforming to others’ expectations. This journey prompts a crucial question: Who are we truly trying to please?
The Universal Truths of Love and Kindness
In the midst of seeking societal approval, there are universal truths that rise above social constructs—love, kindness, and authenticity. These are foundational values that uplift communities and create genuine connections. When we act based on these principles, we positively contribute to society rather than simply trying to win its approval. This shift in focus becomes a journey of personal and communal evolution.
The Barrier of Judgment
One of the biggest barriers to living authentically is the fear of judgment. So often, we allow others' opinions to dictate our choices, prioritizing external validation over our inner voice. But in doing so, we lose sight of community and the shared humanity that binds us. True community thrives on understanding and support, not judgment. When did we start letting others take the place of God in our lives?
To reclaim our humanity, we need to cultivate spaces where people feel safe to express themselves without fear of retribution.
Cultivating Self-Awareness and Vulnerability
During our conversation, my sister and I realized the need to go deeper into self-awareness and vulnerability. Practices like journaling and meditation are helpful, but they often only scratch the surface. Here are a few ways to cultivate deeper self-awareness and vulnerability:
Ask Challenging Questions: Go beyond surface-level reflections. Ask yourself tough questions like, "What are my core values?" "What fears are holding me back?" or "When do I feel most alive?" These questions can unlock profound insights.
Explore Your Emotions: Allow yourself to sit with your feelings instead of pushing them away. What triggers certain emotions? How do they influence your actions? This exploration can help you better understand your reactions.
Seek Feedback: Sometimes, others can offer perspectives we might miss. Ask trusted friends or family how they perceive you. Their insights might reveal blind spots and help you align your actions with your values.
Engage in Vulnerable Conversations: Share your fears, dreams, and experiences with others. These open conversations foster deeper connections and mutual understanding.
Practice Radical Acceptance: Embrace your imperfections and recognize that growth is a continuous journey. Accepting yourself—flaws and all—creates room for genuine vulnerability.
Create a Safe Space: Whether through therapy, support groups, or trusted relationships, find environments where you feel safe to express your true self without judgment.
Reclaiming Our Humanity
To counteract the pressures of societal expectations, we can take intentional steps to reclaim our humanity:
Cultivate Self-Awareness: Reflect on your values and what truly matters to you. Practices like journaling or meditation can help deepen this understanding.
Embrace Vulnerability: Allow yourself to be seen in your authentic form. Sharing your struggles and triumphs can foster connections built on honesty.
Shift Your Focus: Instead of seeking approval, focus on uplifting others. Acts of kindness create a ripple effect that fosters communities of love and support.
Challenge Harmful Norms: Question societal expectations that don’t align with your values. Advocate for change where these constructs may be limiting or harmful.
Reconnect with Community: Engage in local initiatives or groups that resonate with your values. Building relationships with like-minded people can reaffirm your sense of belonging.
Conclusion
This exploration of societal approval and its impact on our humanity is just the beginning of a much larger conversation. My sister and I hope to dive deeper into these themes in a future podcast episode. As we navigate the complexities of societal constructs, let us not lose sight of our humanity. By prioritizing love, kindness, and authenticity, we can create a world that celebrates individuality while nurturing community. Though the journey may be challenging, it is essential for our collective growth and evolution.
